Ok, this is not about hirsutism per say but it certainly may have something to do with hormones….male hormones at that!
This story is based on past true events in my professional life! In doing so, I am going to tweak the story just a little bit!
Basically, I work with men I don’t believe are getting any ass at home. I’m sorry but I just fucking don’t.
How the hell do you come to work and have a fucking attitude all damn day?! That’s to be expected from some angry chic stuck in a corner blaming others for her piss poor choices in her social circle, throwing everyone’s payroll checks at them because she failed to find anything better to do with her life but push a ragged mail cart up 5 floors!
These men come in, bitter and talking in a belittling manner to everyone! The type to have people in and out of meetings, driving to and from locations unnecessarily, all fucking day and expect shit to get done efficiently!
They have expectations of newbies who simply cannot meet them. They give unreasonable tasks with unreasonable rules with unreasonable expectations. The type that expects you to change your car’s oil and rotate the tires and get it right on the first try and don’t ask for even minimum assistance when you’ve never done it before.
And yes, the newbie in this situation is ME! I was given an assignment to accomplish that I simply cannot do without at least minimum assistance. Using the car as an example, would you want your car to be worked on by a newbie who was given no assistance in the manner?! *sigh* I know I know…rhetorical question.
Needless to say, my product was not up to par, and the boss was pissed to shits….but to be told I could not get assistance sent me over the edge! How can I complete something correctly like that, a product that will be driven by people as example, without some peer review or some type of supervisor, especially on the first try!?
I went home beyond stressed and furious to the point I was in tears!
As a single parent, me working is not an option! I HAVE to bring home a check or my daughters do not eat. And in this economic environment, a job is necessary! And I was scared this would affect my evaluation. I felt like I was skating on thin ice when I was pushed on the lake by a bully!
I eventually calmed down, told my supervisors very professionally of the incident, went to other folks for assistance anyway and felt much better about my final product. I felt even better being told by others that they had similar issues, if not worse, of this type!
I also found out this person was historically a migraine to work with! I am not sure his age but I’m pretty sure this dude was in his sixties. So when someone says historically, I think this person has been a dickhead all his damn professional life! Was probably even a rotten kid!
A friend on Facebook gave me this link and not only did I bust out laughing but it did actually make me feel better!
So this blog post is about shitty male attitudes and why they have them ALL THE TIME. I have never worked somewhere where NO ONE likes you because your personality is that rotten.
That would be a very depressing environment and even in typing this, I am thinking about other employment options! But it got me to thinking about male hormonal issues!
Here is a list of signs over my recent and past experience with men that have led me to believe they truly do have mental premenstrual symptoms:
A MAN HAS MENTAL PMS ISSUES WHEN:
- Keeps a damn attitude. I mean come on, bitches do that! Not dudes! If he getting a great piece of ass on the regular, why the hell is he so fucking mad?!
- Looks at girl’s boobs and asses entirely too much. I mean, in the work place that can be quite unprofessional. Why is it the cute secretary’s fault you aint married or divorced or married an overweight swamp rat?!
- Purposely makes everyone’s life miserable because of the marriage to the swamp rat!
- Gives piss poor, half ass compliments when you know your work was stellar!
- Makes a great salary but is driving a soccer van….and his kids are grown.
- Rolls his eyes at himself.
- Is the last person in the entire building to go home for the day.
- Spends the night at work instead of hauling his ass home.
- converses with himself.
- Walks with a slump, not a stride.
- More than likely has a medicine cabinet full of pill bottles for all kinds of……..shit.
- Realizes it will be too costly to divorce the swamp rat.
- Finds the dirt on the floor more fascinating than the sky.
- Never tags along for company outings.
- Has arguments with the ceilings.
- His best friends (his only friends) are his toes.
So these are just of the signs of a man having some PMS issues.
Of course this is not an exclusive list; feel free to tell me some!
And for the fellas, don’t start getting all sensitive and shit! This is just for the men who try to make others lives’ miserable because theirs are. If you are not like this, then don’t trip. Laugh about it, go shag your girlfriend and go the hell to sleep happy!
If you are, then get the hell away from my blog! I don’t need you cursing it!
Thanks for the laughs!